IC Inbox [Folkmore]

[adherencetofacts]

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[adherencetofacts]

I've had dark days, but I'm not that bad. If I were, I trust you wouldn't give me any but take it away.

[ Nanami looks over at Geto. ] You seem... different.

[a_darker_path]

I would. [Not that he thinks Nanami would ever let himself lose control like that. ]

Do I?

[adherencetofacts]

[ A nod, on both counts. Nanami looks over at Geto. ]

Not simply because you aren't having a panic attack.

[a_darker_path]

That does tend to make a difference, yes. [Dry but he exhales a breath.]

I am sorry about that. I just- [Geto shrugs a shoulder, rubs a hand over his face. ]

...He said I broke his heart.

[adherencetofacts]

I'm glad you called me. And stayed over. [ It's what he's here for, and he appreciates being the person Geto reached out to. It certainly helps already knowing each other, but he could have gone off on his own.

Nanami sighs, glad it isn't liquor time. ]

Yes. [ Nanami waits for Geto to say more, before he contributes anything. ]

[a_darker_path]

I don't know how that's even possible. I know what you've told me about what happens between where I'm at now and where he came in and I get they separated us, but how did I go that far? [It doesn't make sense, not if Satoru was still there.]

[adherencetofacts]

[ The kettle whistles, and Nanami sighs. ] One moment.

[ He pours the hot water over the leaves, sets a timer on his relic, and brings the tea pot and a couple cast iron teacups (they stack together) out to the living room, set upon appropriate pot holders so as not to damage the table. ]

I don't know everything, but I can tell you what context I do know, if you would like.

[a_darker_path]

[ He lets Nanami get settled. ] I know Amanai and Haibara were major parts of whatever I ended up doing, from our previous conversations. [But then, he'd had people to talk to here, at least.]

Tell me what you can. I don't think it'll change my choices here, because I've already made my position clear to Satoru, but I can't help but wonder what happened to push us that far apart.

[adherencetofacts]

They were part of it, yes. Haibara in particular was one of the final straws. I don't blame you for that. The Elders are pieces of shit. We all agree on that, even if we handle it in different ways.

[ Nanami pours tea for both of them, picks up his cups, and blows across the surface. ]

There's a mix of general and specifics. You and Gojo retrieved Amanai's body from the cult that paid Fushiguro Toji to kill her. I don't know what exactly that was like, but you were shaken by it. You never were the same afterward. The missions themselves didn't help. There was more and more collateral damage, more people freaking out over curses they couldn't see. Just worse.

I mean, fuck, people were worshipping the cursed spirit that— [ Nanami takes a deep breath. ] It was a lot of bad shit. You were needed, so you went and you went and you went. You, Gojo, Ieri, you hardly ever saw each other. You and Gojo were always out on missions. Ieri was busy healing other sorcerers who got hurt on missions. We were all there, but you were alone.

[ He hasn't even addressed the biggest issue around Geto leaving. ] It got bad. I don't blame you for leaving. I'd left at that point after all. Gojo wasn't suffering the way you were. He mastered keeping Limitless up at all times. He thrived off the missions. And he, he missed the way you were suffering. We all did, but the rest of us missing it wouldn't hurt like him missing it. It seems like that drove a wedge of pain that grew until it snapped.

[ Nanami looks over at Geto, watching him carefully. He remembers Geto taunting Gojo on the front lawn of the school. It was still so fucked up, so many years later. ] You needed help, and you didn't get it. From anyone.

[a_darker_path]

[He listens, his fingers curling around the cup and doesn't speak, just letting himself think about what Nanami had said. Satoru being caught up in his own path makes sense, given everything. He's always known he needed Satoru more than Satoru ever needed him.

And after the conversation the night before, he can see why he left too. If only a few days dealing with Satoru acting the way he had been acting had affected him that badly, months of it?

Everyone has their limits after all. When he finallly speaks, his voice is neutral and it's after sipping the tea.] Do you think he was in love with me or was it just the fact I left that hurt him?

[adherencetofacts]

[ What a question. It's a huge one but hardly that shocking. There's a benefit to coming in a decade later, seeing what Gojo was like over all those years. Seeing parts of the final confrontation and Gojo afterward...

Nanami takes a few even breaths before he answers. For being so smart, Gojo's a damn idiot. ]

He's in love with you. He was too blind to see it until you left.

[a_darker_path]

[ His fingers tighten around the cup for a moment before he exhales a breath, setting it down. ] It's not that I didn't want to believe him. I just- [He trails off, lets his head drop back so he's looking up at the ceiling.]

It felt like it was too much of what I wanted to hear. Even if you'd answered differently, I wouldn't have done anything to change what's happened since I arrived here.

[adherencetofacts]

[ It's only been a bit under thirty-six hours since they parted ways the previous time. Clearly it's been an eventful New Year's Eve. Things have changed between them.

They talked. ]

If he didn't love you, that would be highly unhealthy, Geto. It isn't healthy that you're thinking like that, that any piece of him is better than no piece at all.

It could sabotage what you two are building together now. You don't want to do that, do you?

[a_darker_path]

Have I ever claimed to be healthy about Satoru, Nanami? [It's quiet enough, his gaze still focusing on the ceiling. ]

And if you think he's in love with me, that's good enough for me to try and stop overthinking everything. I don't know that I'll succeed, but I can try.

[adherencetofacts]

No. [ Faint. Barely a murmur. Nanami can never claim that. The two were codependent from the first time he saw them. Incredible but not exactly something he wanted to emulate. ]

He is. He's as fucked up as you are, but Gojo's in love with you.

[a_darker_path]

You don't get to where we are without ending up like that, I don't think. [But as long they're on the same page, it should be manageable.]

Then everything should work out.

[adherencetofacts]

[ Nanami sighs. ]

You can both still unfuck yourselves up to some degree.

[a_darker_path]

I don't think that's going to be easy but we'll see what happens here.

[adherencetofacts]

[ Nanami nods and drinks his tea. ]

At least there's a chance here. No curses to get in the way.

[a_darker_path]

That doesn't mean nothing will interfere, though. It's just going to be something we weren't looking for. I've heard the trials can be pretty out there.

[adherencetofacts]

That's life. There will always be something that happens. Something we didn't predict. [ Nanami considers the little he's read. ] We cannot control what the trials are, but we can get through them together.

[a_darker_path]

I heard from the other special grade, Yuta, that they can take your memories and replace them. So it may not be easy as facing them together.

[adherencetofacts]

[ Nanami raises an eyebrow. ] You'll have to be more specific about what Okkotsu was talking about. There was a post on the twenty-fifth of someone who woke up a couple decades older, but given the lack of many posts to that effect, it does not seem to be a common occurrence.

[a_darker_path]

He said there were a few of these trials where he had his memories replaced with other memories. Like he lived a different life entirely. [Which is not exactly something Suguru wants to experience.]

[adherencetofacts]

Alternate universes in common parlance. [ Nanami considers that, frowns slightly. ] It seems like he returned to being himself afterward, given how he was when we met.